Are INTJ Bad at Love? The real-life experience of an INTJ

Are INTJ Bad at Love? The real-life experience of an INTJ

Hello, I’m Tsumugi Yuri!

This time I will explain about love, such as whether INTJ is bad at love, its characteristics, how to deal with it, and the type that is compatible.

In conclusion, INTJ is not good at dealing with emotions and is very not suitable for love because it emphasizes individuality and efficiency.

Are INTJ Bad at Love? The real-life experience of an INTJ

Why INTJ is not suitable for love

First To introduce the author, it is a genuine intj type that will become an intj type no matter how many times you try

Just to start with, it’s not that I’m completely unsuited to love .

For intj men and women respectively

To put it to extremes , Even if you are an intj type, if you have a lot of income, you will look like an idiot lol

I am running a matching app, but honestly putting aside whether it is good or bad, and leaving aside the satisfaction of the married life after that, as long as the income is high, it will be popular to some extent

Even if you are not good-looking or not good at talking, your income is considered to be important in love


But I have to say that if you are an intj like me who doesn’t have any income, it’s pretty tough (to be mentioned later) lol

For women

I remember seeing several people who match with intj type women or write in profile .

I can’t help imagining it, but it depends on the will of the person (I guess that’s true).

What it means is that I think it will change greatly depending on whether you really want to have a lover or which conditions you value.

But it doesn’t work as well as other types, and if you compare it with the average, you can say that it is as difficult as men.

INTJ is generally poor at interpersonal relationships

The reason why intj is bad at love is as follows.

    • Focus on efficiency over emotion

    • Tend to attack in their own original way

    • Not good at looking out

    • No interest in common practices such as anniversaries

    • Little knowledge of social trends and common sense

    • Consumes a lot of power when meeting people

To sum up, it doesn’t pay attention to emotions, so all the elements are not popular lol

Now I want to dig into some of the reasons.

Focusing on efficiency rather than fun

For example, I think intj types are thrifty or don’t waste much .

However, most people travel, spend money on meals, or buy things on impulse .

At this point, the difference in values becomes more apparent.

When I’m told that I want to go to a stylish cafe, I wonder what the meaning of it is.

I started to feel that I was just being stingy, but lol, intj shouldn’t be interested in the scenery or food at all, so this lack of taste is a minus if you say a minus (although it is a plus in terms of being thrifty).

Tend to stick to their own way

There is a fine line between the pros, but intj does not take advice from others .

I just like to customize it for myself, so I take data and measure which one was efficient, and then I adopt lol

For example, if the Internet says that this kind of clothing is good for dating, don’t you think they will do that?

However, this I think it will also be an advantage as I will explain later .

Good at theory, bad at sense

Anyway intj is the type that puts the most emphasis on theory .

Especially I can say that I am fatally bad at grasping something with my five senses lol

I think many people don’t like noisy places or crowded places.

In addition, I’m also not good at grasping emotions, so everything that should be dealt with in terms of sensations and emotions, such as appearance and people’s feelings, tends to be handled by theory lol

In a word, you think that love can also be managed theoretically (to be honest, I still think so).

I can’t say that I can’t do anything because of my personality, but it can be said that this is one of the reasons why I am not good at love.

I get tired easily when I meet people who are out of fashion

intj is not interested in fashion at all, so the range of topics is quite biased lol

In my case, I know a little about world events because it is related to stocks, but I don’t know about topics such as entertainers at all

It is a subtle point if it is directly related to love, but You have to expand the topic first in matching applications .

I think there are many people who don’t like this (especially at work and school).

Another fatal problem is that meeting people in the first place consumes a lot of physical energy lol

That’s why you tend to reply to emails late, and it’s no wonder people say that you don’t have many chances to meet someone and aren’t suitable for love.

How to deal with poor love

Then, I would like to explain how the intj type works in love.

First of all, I will introduce two patterns of coping, one that is said in the world and the other that I thought of on my own lol

I don’t mean to say it myself, but I feel that the love advice that intj thinks may be true theoretically, but the reality is more complicated . w

Be sensitive to people’s emotions

Be considerate of people’s emotions “, this is what is said in the world (mainly on the Internet), love advice for intj lol

When I think about it carefully, I feel that it is said to be amazing , but when I chew it down, I think Don’t worry about theory and efficiency, just think about the other person .

It’s not that intj doesn’t think about it, but I think it tends to be a give-and-take, or rather a profit-and-loss account.

I think that intj is a good property because it is basically kind and does not take the inefficient action of cheating, but I think that the measure of love is self-centered .

Not all of them, but since they were diagnosed with the intj type, I thought it was something I should keep in mind.

Original theory breaks through 1 point

Solve love with your own original theory , I recommend this lol

The point is, for example, if it’s a matching app, you write this kind of profile, and if it matches with this kind of person, you do this, and if it doesn’t match, you analyze where it didn’t match, how to test the hypothesis and the result w

To be specific, it is a way of thinking about how much you can match the other person’s strengths with your wishes while trying to work on your own strengths as much as possible


When I was writing it myself, I thought maybe it was the consulting person lol (wrong)

It is said that intj tends to think of life like chess , but I feel that it comes from this.

In fact, there was a beautiful intj who was a bit like a visual type who said “I won’t talk on the phone unless I play this online game” on the matching app (this guy is all about matching apps) lol

I think that’s too good to be true, but I’m not good at what I don’t like anymore, so it’s probably more fun and better to capture your life with what you’re good at .

Author’s Love Story

I also have a very low income at intj, but I have had several lovers lol

It’s just that when I was in school and in the first half of my life, I was hopelessly not popular and I had no love (Gachi).

In a word, it is a triple punch of high hope, face eating and yin kya lol

However, there are risks and opportunities when it comes to office romance, but I think that the world has become favorable for intj as the matching application has spread to the world relatively.

As for me, my background is unique, and I like to listen to people and laugh, so I put such things front and center.

Also, it’s better to think about where to compromise.

I think there is something like what to compromise and how much to compromise (to get compromised) when meeting on the Internet.

Good at self-analysis and data collection

I think that the characteristic of intj is that it is good at self-analysis and data collection .

Well, it’s also a disadvantage because the way it’s shaped is unique or too unrealistic lol, but when I was running a matching app, I thought that people are surprisingly bad at self-promotion or don’t collect data.

So it is true that intj is bad at love, but it is also true that there is no need to be so pessimistic.

Compatible types and characteristics

As I wrote in INTJ and Other Type Compatibility Ranking , In terms of MBTI, the 4 types of isfp, infp, esfp, and entj are physically and theoretically compatible .

However, other types are certainly not incompatible.

Or rather, if you are an MBTI maniac like me, if you learn the compatibility of types, when you know the type of the other person, you will have a preconception of whether it is good or bad, so it may have the opposite effect lol

Of course, I have confidence in the compatibility and there is a basis as a real experience, but I think it is better to moderate it.

Specifically compatible features

However, there are definitely compatible type characteristics , which are as follows:

    • Talkative

    • Do not speak up

    • Not a theorist type

    • Close sense of money

So I’m going to drill down a little bit.

By the way, it is natural, but it should be different for each person, lol, I would be happy if you can see it as a reference more than ever.

You should leave it to the other person to talk

Unless you don’t mind if it’s silent, Basically, intj shouldn’t talk too much lol

To be exact, when you talk, you get tired easily, or there are many people who don’t like it , so I think it is better to let the other person lead.

People who are good at listening should be more popular, so not being good at talking shouldn’t be that bad.

People who don’t speak up

I wrote it in another article, If anything, intj has a weak mental lol

Reference article (intj and Mental)↓

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And the right argument here is a straight ball that is not wrapped in oblate.

The intj type will often say opinions that are different from those in the world, so if you are told the right opinion every time, you will not have the mental ability to laugh

In short, intj’s purpose in life is to achieve his long-term plan in his own way .

It should be the most troublesome to be told that it is a-da-da, so I think it is better to laugh and cheer for it or accept it.

Theoretical types clash

Again, this will vary from person to person, but theoretical people should be avoided .

In other words, it becomes a battle over which theory is correct.

It is good if it is beneficial and enjoyable, but when it comes to a serious discussion, will it be settled?

Probably I feel that the degree of freedom as an intj will be considerably narrowed .

Equally frugal seems to fit

Since intj should be more thrifty, if the other party is a spendthrift, there will probably be a fight lol

Of course this is also not necessarily bad, as it should lead to a good balance by itself.

However, if is the exact opposite of intj (not a theoretical type), the sense of value is also often opposite , I think that the sense of money sometimes crosses

In that case, I think the direction will be whether you need to consult, find someone who is compatible, or provide.

intj and Conclusion in Love

    • intj is not good at love

    • Not enough to be pessimistic

    • There are also advantages, so focus on them

    • Compromise and finding partners are also important

    • I recommend people who don’t care about their own weaknesses

I think it’s something like this.

It turned out to be quite a powerful article, but the reason is that I was rather tired of intj articles that were just a collection of online articles lol

As a direction, it is of course important to correct the weak points, but intj is a rare type and there are some aspects of his natural character that can’t be helped, lol, I think that the strategy to utilize the strong points so that the weak points are not conspicuous is effective in love, and above all, it is fun (This thought above all makes me feel like intj)


INTJ is not good at love, I talked about my real experience!

It depends on the person, but to put it in extreme terms, love is like a luxury item, and I think it is good to enjoy and work on it without putting too much effort.